It's true. You really need to deal with the fact that everything you like sucks. Your favorite band? Sucks. They're a one-hit wonder group and they're only on the radio cause the hook is simple and annoyingly catchy. I've heard better music coming out of a pack of cats in heat. Your favorite tv show? Sucks. The writing is abysmal, the acting sub-par, and the premise is just retarded. It's as if the network execs took a thousand monkeys and put them in front of a thousand typewriters and used what they came up with on the second day (between bouts of poo throwing). Your girlfriend? Sucks. Not in the good way, either. It wouldn't be so bad if she was just ugly, but she's also dumb as a box of rocks. She kills more brain cells than alcohol and drugs combined. You favorite sports team? Sucks. Regardless of their record, they are horrible. The only fans they have are either too stupid to realize it or are beholden to some irrational sense of home team loyalty. You favorite video game platform? Sucks. It only has like one good game, and that's just a cheap rip-off of a better game for a different system. Every other system has way better games and people are having a lot more fun with them.

Just thought you should know.